DESIRE

It was  Marcia Wieder, the CEO and founder of the Dream University who said that “desire is a powerful force that can be used to make things happen” But to desire something, you have to be in the know that “that something” does exist.

Yesterday I held a meeting with the parents of the children in the CpCenter. My main objective was to make them in the know of Conductive Education and to desire it for their children. Having desired it, try to make it happen.  There are seven children in the center, services are rendered free. Two of the parents were absent and those who came, apart from mummy Princess were quite late, she seems to still be floating in her Happiness on the positive changes she observes in her daughter. Actually, only the mothers of the children came, so it was at last month’s meeting. I decided to make the meeting a monthly affair where the welfare of the Cpcenter is discussed and ways to improve on her activities sought. Some may not have money but they may have ideas or know people in organizations that we may approach for assistance and support.

By the time the meeting started over an hour behind schedule, I was so unhappy that it started as a lecture, me giving  a lecture on responsibility,  the importance of being punctual and showing commitment to the center which means to their children. The need for us to come together and work as a force for it is only then that we can ask for and get services.

Lecture over, apologies given and accepted, I passed round what would have been the agenda of the meeting, but because time has far gone, I needed to get back to Ziim, her lunch time was getting close, I decided to treat the most important topic, ” Conductive Education : the way to go for our children with CP”.  I quickly and as simply as I could explained what CE is, the need for us to walk that path, how late Nigeria seems to be in partaking of this tonic that the whole world has been drinking since the collapse of the iron wall. But it is not yet late, it is us parents that will make it happen.

How??  They asked. I informed them about my effort so far. I am talking with a group. We are looking at July next year. We are looking at about 20K British Pounds to cover consultation, airfare, and accommodation of about 2 conductors and other expenses. How much is that in our money??  Mummy Princess picks her phone, scrolls to calculator, works it out…..about N5.3M,(five million, three hundred thousand naira only)  Ah!! they all screamed, owo re’, big money!!!. Yes, big money, but what do we profit with that??

To help me get the effect I desire from this meeting, I had invited Mr.D, and happily he was there, with his fourteen year old son with CP. Mr.D came to me on referral from somebody after the death of his wife about two months ago. He wanted a place to institutionalize  his son. He said since his wife died he finds it difficult to take care of the boy who is totally dependent for all ADL. He is non verbal and incontinent does not walk.  He has visited a few homes but none has space for the boy. One told him that they do not take children from parents, they only take abandoned children babies. It is becoming increasingly difficult for him to cope, the boy is mostly left on his own for the father to go and look for their daily bread, he does not have a steady source of income.  The boy has one sibling, a girl, she is far away in Abuja in the university, pls read she has moved on. I told him that I do not run a home, but that I would ask around and I did and was informed of one in Igandu ran by a pastor and his wife. I have the address.

At the point where they were shouting “big money”, I introduced Mr. D and his son and asked him to tell us his story and his desire. He did, ending that he desires a place where he can keep the boy and visit. I asked him if he thinks that would have been his wife’s desire, he said he is sure it would not but that women can handle these things better..thank you sir. I asked what interventions they gave the boy when he was younger, not so much, as if we have a lot, weekly physiotherapy at the general hospital and as the boy got older, it became difficult for the mother to back him from the house   to the bus stop to get transport (of course they do not own a car, how many of  us do here?). They used to carry him to revivals in the church, but that  too became difficult after a while so they just left him at home. “Oh we prayed a lot, so much and we still do. It is on his account that we left the catholic church and joined a powerful bible believing church”  Good.

If Mr. and Mrs. D had information about something they were sure that would have improved the condition of their son, would they not have tried it? Sure they would have. I am sure Mr. D will give anything to get some of his son back. Now here we are being informed about something that has been in existence for about sixty years, proven to have helped children like ours get lots of independence so that we too can get some independence and we are talking about how big the money is instead of how to get the money to do what we need to do. I told them that the 21st century is the best time to have a disability as there are lots of innovations on equipments, augmentative devices, different therapies both conventional and alternatives. I have been to Denmark to look at this and that in U.K. I am doing that because I realised that both address the CP problem from same perspective,  and I can easily teach it to people which  I have been doing. We apply it in the center.  I see some positive results albeit slow (show me a therapy that is not). But I have read looked at CE critically, I have met people who are doing it for their children, the effect is something I find hard to ignore.

Then I picked my laptop and showed them clips from here and here. Ha, you mean my pikin fit do this? Ha, you mean they fit help am walk? I said, that is one of the things CE aims at among so many others. Their desires were awakened. Mummy Princess goes; do you know, one person can give us this money? Well I do not know that, but we all can attempt to raise it. Yes ke’, we can ask even in our churches, mosques or town meetings..that now is mummy A.  And from our friends….mummy P, no amount is too small or too big. Now you get the bit. We can go to these big big companies….mummy A, only some of them like to give their products. Hm.. we need  money not their products.

We then looked through pictures to see the progress of the children, especially those who have been coming to the CpCenter since last year. We noted some progress, but I pointed out that I am very positive that the progress will be a lot more with CE. Em.. how are we sure our children will be suitable?….mummy A. I use Ziim as a sample I told them, Ziim  who is yet to have head control and functional use of hands has been assessed and she is said to have potential.  If she could pass as it were,then children like A who talks, uses her hands albeit poorly, has head control, or Mr.P who can sometimes pull himself up to sit, though for a short while and can crawl roll, or Mr.A who sits can stand with little support and is attempting to walk, will just have a walk over. I showed them Ziim’s assessment pictures like this one.

Haba, you mean she fit sit like this?? How dem do am?……mummy A. Honestly I was perplexed, they can even get her to do more. Ha.. abeg, make we go think of how to find this money…mummy P, in fact, the money no plenty sef. Talk of motivation being desire!!

The meeting ended on that note with everyone agreeing to be a fund raiser. In our next meeting we shall have structured method, I will make dash cards and write letters. They can talk to their various pastors, imams or town members andI will come and make presentation. So when you see me standing on the podium in a church, no I have not turned to a pastor, I most likely will be making appeal for support in our effort to do what people have been doing since, helping their children face a better tomorrow.

As Mr.D went out to go and find a taxi to take him and his son home, I could see the sober look on all their faces, then mummy Princess said, abeg God, no let us be carrying our children still as teenagers. I replied, here we have a chance to assist God. Yes oh they chorused.

As they left, each taking copies of the Cpcenter brochure, I could feel the zeal in them to achieve  our goal, at least to make an effort. I know that we shall achieve it for we have the desire which according to Napoleon Hill is the  starting point of all achievement.  Please join us in making this a reality in whatever way you can.

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